Why your prospects want you to talk about their pain
To most people I talk to, it’s a bit of a pill to swallow the whole idea of speaking to a prospects “pain.”
It just doesn’t feel right, to be pointing out what’s wrong.
Isn’t that negative?
Well, that certainly is one view.
Yet, very few of us go to the doctor because we’re feeling extraordinarily healthy!
Imagine. You’re sitting on the examining table explaining your symptoms to the physician.
You tell him you’ve had a screaming sore throat for 5 days, you have chills and painful swollen glands, and your sinuses aren’t draining.
You hurt all over, and all you want to do is sleep.
But, all the gentle doctor wants to talk about is how shiny your hair is and what great oral hygiene you have.
If this went on for very long, how long would you sit there on the table?
You’d probably wonder whether the doctor was even listening to you, let alone whether he was competent enough to help you get well. This would be your conclusion no matter how nice and gentle and positive he might be.
What I hope you get is that, as the solopreneur, sales professional, service provider or business person, you are naturally solution-oriented.
This is a good thing.
However, your prospective clients are absorbed — at least for the moment — in their problem.
Sure, they want it solved.
But, first they have to actually hear what you’re saying. Then, they can be receptive to your solution-message.
Empathy is the biggest key to marketing.
The copywriter Robert Collier advises “Enter the conversation that’s already in their head. Don’t try to create a new conversation.”
And, when you have a terrible cold that you just can’t shake on your own, that conversation likely is not about how great you look.
Tshombe – You make a great point here.
Most of us naturally begin marketing by talking about ourselves: I provide these services, I have these qualifications, I’ve been in business this long. It’s understandable, especially considering marketing isn’t easy or natural, and we have to learn how to do it. So we start with what we know, and that is ourselves.
It takes more time, research, and maturity as a business owner to know what our prospects are most concerned about, and to understand how our business can ease their pain. When we are really good, it doesn’t have to sound like we’re talking about their pain, but we can still connect emotionally with their needs.
Barbara Breckenfeld´s last [type] ..Every business tells a story – what’s yours?
Thanks for the comments, Barbara!
Yes, I think you articulated it well when you said “we can still connect emotionally with their needs.” That’s really what we mean when we say to talk about the prospects “pain.”
People want to know that you understand them, you “get’ them. Then, the natural assumption is you likely know how to help them find relief.
Great point. So often with Law of Attraction, we want people to focus on what’s right but often we have to show empathy and let them describe what’s wrong (briefly) before we can actually help them.
Thanks so much for the great comment, Karen. Yes, you get it: when we show empathy, the prospect says “Wow! This person DOES understand where I’m coming from.” Articulating the challenges of our prospects isn’t “negative.” It shows we care about them enough to learn deeply about what concerns them.
The interesting (and valuable) thing about articulating the “pain” so well is that there is an automatic trust that is built up at the same time. The prospect then assumes we also have the solution to what ails them.
Then, of course, we have to deliver the solution!